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About this blog

Highlights of simple things observed that were taken for granted pre stroke

Entries in this blog

High anxiety

Home alone xiety is back. It's rare that I am left home alone overnight to November 12th of 2013. But just need to reach out to someone I know some of I love you have felt the same thing. Sports in my paranoia I sent a text message to my daughter and said I will text you in the morning if you don't get a text from me call me please and she called me just a few minutes ago and said do you want to spend the night at my house and I said no I'm going to be fine I know that I just wanted to reach
Jayallen

Jayallen

4

Another wonderful Sunday

Although the temperature outside was the living room with the big picture window overlooking the lake and the Sun was beating down on me and it was so warm so I grab my book san enjoyed myself for awhile.   Absorbing the Sun and reading my book but minus 10 degrees is not the time to think about going down to the beach. I am so blessed And the individuals I have met to the support groups in through my volunteer work. And my amazing family my wife is always manage to keep house for us to liv
Jayallen

Jayallen

0

I jumped in with both feet

And it felt so good to be on that series in front of 15 or 20 friends who are also auditioning it was fun. One major reason I decided to audition was our theater family mentally emotionally financially and spiritually. I decided it would be a great tribute to all of them to get back on stage again journey and I'm coming back strong I talk to a good friend of mine who is producing the show while that would be so cool if we can make it happen.   Jay
Jayallen

Jayallen

1

You know it's cold when.....

The 37 degree water temperature of Lake Huron causes steam, the air temperature is 0. .. you can see your breath and my breath xodebenses and forms icicles on my moustache. Watching the sunrise what glorious sight and watching the waves come off the lake 1 2 3 foot rollers but no wind this is caused by low pressure. Even the birds are chirping at me saying what are you doing out in this cold so that's what I did. I'm done now and the bus is about an hour what a lovely lovely day. Be bles
Jayallen

Jayallen

0

27 months and still going Strong

27 months ago today experience life altering cerebral hemorrhage and stroke when I think how far I've come and how much what a blessing life is and how fortunate I am to be here It may be a very frigid February morning but when I think about my faceless friends names on a computer screen and their words of hope support encouragement and inspiration my entire B is filled with warmth and joy thank you all for all you've done let's keep moving forward together. Be blessed and be a blessing, Jay
Jayallen

Jayallen

2

Stay on your feet young man

I was heading out to catch the bus I ran into one of the shopkeepers he asked me how I was and I said excellent except for a little mishap this morning and I told him about slipping on the ice and he said stay on your feet young man now I have to admit that 54 it's not very often that being referred to as a young man I was heading out to catch the bus and I ran into one of his shop keepers on the street next to where I have my coffee he asked me how I was and I said excellent except for a little
Jayallen

Jayallen

1

Stay on your feet young man

I was heading out to catch the bus I ran into one of the shopkeepers he asked me how I was and I said excellent except for a little mishap this morning and I told him about slipping on the ice and he said stay on your feet young man now I have to admit that 54 it's not very often that being referred to as a young man I was heading out to catch the bus and I ran into one of his shop keepers on the street next to where I have my coffee he asked me how I was and I said excellent except for a little
Jayallen

Jayallen

0

The human brain is an amazing thing

We all have our deficits as result of the stroke so maybe similar that you're probably very different but this morning was an example of the dichotomy between my long term and short term memory. While having coffee I saw gentleman an acquaintance of mine that I haven't seen in at least 15 years we worked closely together on a project 30 years ago I gave him the quick cliff note version of my aneurysm and stroke and a gentleman with him since you know maybe. ? A speech pathologist at one of t
Jayallen

Jayallen

0

Slip sliding away

Not the song just me I had to go to the store this morning before coffee was only 3 blocks from the coffee house so I was good walking until I hit that patch of ice we all remember the Looney Toon cartoons. That's what I look like this morning my feet slipped forward then slipped backwards and then I went down of course my left side is my weak side from a stroke slight limp I had prior to falling it isn't quite as lovely walking today his recent days past after I hit the ground and I let out
Jayallen

Jayallen

0

Caution wet floor

I'm so glad they put the sign up I didn't slip on the wet floor I almost tripped over the sign because I didn't see it. Maybe I need a sign ir a white cabe Just another blessing brought to me by my stroke. Must laugh about it otherwise I would cry, Jay
Jayallen

Jayallen

0

Brief moment of paranoid panic

I was checking my email this morning and noticed I could I received an email from an essay my first thought was oh god what's this about then I realized it was from the National Stroke Associationlol Jay
Jayallen

Jayallen

0

Odd man out revisited

I shared my poem with two friends yesterday and the first one said it's more poetic prose than a poem but it is nice that kind of took me back 30 plus years to very painful event while attempting to share a poem with a friend exposing my vulnerability by doing so she threw it back at me and say you call that a poem that comment shaped my way for the next 30 years. The other friends that I shared my poem with yesterday later in the day hey she was reading it she looked at me and said oh my
Jayallen

Jayallen

0

A beautiful winter morning

I awoke this morning to 2 inches of new snow is continuing to snow big snow flakes but there's no wind the snow is covering up the last remains of the snow piles with the dirt and just ugly looking mounds and the brown grass it was such a lovely walk from where the bus drop me off to the coffee house that I hang in it was such a lovely walk from where the bus drop me off to the coffee house that I hang out a little and bundle up like a Michelin Man I was covered with snow sticking to everything
Jayallen

Jayallen

0

polar opposites

This morning while having coffee young lady walked into the coffee house and one of the workers asked her how she was doing today and she said absolutely wonderful thank you for asking and I said that is so refreshing to hear someone say that especially on a rainy gray day she says I love the rain I told her my philosophy of finding the beauty in every day and her response was that is cool because I try to do the same thing   Later in the day heading out to catch my bus a gentleman walked past
Jayallen

Jayallen

1

Sound Judgement (finally) at least once in two years

And I told her my new normal includes me struggling to stay awake till 9 o'clock let alone having a beverage. I'm a really nice Italian dinner so I had to have a glass of red wine with dinner and then I fell asleep before halftime of the game. And I say finally because I've made some really bad judgement calls but the nice thing is I can share this with you all and you get it. Be well, Jay
Jayallen

Jayallen

1

Happiness

I know life is been hell for her I just don't know how much my wife said I wish you would reconsider auditioning as I considered it almost died a couple times I just think what dreams bring so much joy and hope to all my friends I have to do it of course I'm going to enjoy myself too what a wonderful thing to be able to share with my wife again Be blessed and be a blessing, Jay
Jayallen

Jayallen

2

Hey lovely lazy Sunday

No buses run on Sunday so I slept in late Mccarthy perfect timing to watch the sunrise the goose party seems to act windows down there's only five this morning must be the young ones the older ones have realized I can't put a string of parties together three days in row Much like my life free Stroke sunday is my day to do my laundry and I always cook dinner on today's menu is incredible lasagna. The sauce is my wife's Italian family recipe which I made and I use a blend of five different Ita
Jayallen

Jayallen

2

With passion a gift and creative energy I'm on top of the world

Physically mentally and emotionally I felt great the question of the day was why? What is so different about today than other days so I can rreplicat it Physically I had a great nights sleep which always helps. Test result of my successful endeavor to focus my creative energy in the poem odd man out. I have always said if one of my poems moves one person that I am a success as a poet. I am humbled by the positive response I get from you as well as my friends who are not survivors includin
Jayallen

Jayallen

0

Thanking God for another

Number once glorious because I'm here yesterday I talked about the case out in front of my house because not only in the lake in front of my house there on my beach and in my front yard and leave doubled in numbers so there's close to:50 today I don't know why they're attracted but I'm glad they are because they are beautiful Byrd to see Be blessed and be a blessing, Jay
Jayallen

Jayallen

2

I am oh so blessed

Drinking coffee in the predawn sky, trying to break through another 30 minutes to sunrise. across the lake on the Canadian shore I see the street lights flickering off one by one, as they sense the coming of day light. a dozen geese swim together along the shore, there is strength in numbers. Much like the strength we share within our numbers.   I was reading some of the commentson my poem "Odd man out, I'm forced to stop and wipe away my tears, your comments are so beautiful, reflecying my
Jayallen

Jayallen

0

Odd man out?!

This is sometbinv i wrote today and I send all of you because you all mean so much to me   Odd man out Shared words Shared emotions fears joys frustrations celebrations support and inspirations Shared life altering experience All different yet all the same just as well. A kunship founded in words A bond that will not break A gut level instinctual fondness Of so .any hat I have never met and likely never will! I wear my heart on my sleeve I bare my inner being to you my FRIENDS.
Jayallen

Jayallen

5

saying goodbye and good luckand best wishes

Early this morning I went to hospital because one of my patients w's being discharged. I was glad to have the opportunity to say good bye good luck and best wishes. I gave her a card with info about the two different support. Groups and the stroke network. She has such appositive attitude, I told it took me awhile to get my positive attire, I said that was a big step on her journey.   I am oh so blessed to be here and offer encouragement to new survivors. Be blessed and be a blessing,
Jayallen

Jayallen

2

Spring is in the air

It started yesterday with the geese and swans and today was standing on the corner waiting for my boss I always try to find a spot where I can get some sunshine there were two pairs of sparrows my initial reaction was older fighting then I realized they weren't fighting I think they were made great in front of me I'm so glad it nature is so comfortable with me they want more than 5 feet away from me when I get home this afternoon or 6 year old grandson was over so after dinner we were playing w
Jayallen

Jayallen

0

Nature out my front door what a blessing

Earlier today there were three geese swimming in the lake in front of my house one was leading the other two following if they got to close the lead goose would flap your wings and fly about 10 yards ahead just constantly stay up in front of them now I see three swans swimming by two leading one I wonder if it's the same guys that have been here over the past couple years or the same swans that have been here for the past couple years just another reminder of the beauty of nature and the blessin
Jayallen

Jayallen

2

Redefining January thaw

From my earliest memories as a child I always remember at some point during January in the January winters we had a couple days of moderate temperatures above 32 degrees so as of January thaw This year we have to redefine that January thaw it's supposed to get up to 47 degrees this afternoon and it will stay above freezing overnight much closer to late March early April temperatures I'm not complaining even if we get a little bit of rain today because the rain does bring the flowers just hopefu
Jayallen

Jayallen

1