Jhari's Blog

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Ask me how I REALLY am

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More frustration

I was so upset that I missed chat last week. By the time I remembered it was 8:45 and I was just too tired to log in. I am frustrated (as usual) with what's going on with mom. With the last UA C&S, there was still bacteria in the urine. Prodius, but now don't know what the plan is.   In the last week, mom has seemed to be sleeping more and just seems weak. Bloodwork was done last Tuesday and her hemoglobin was 10.7. The doc ordered 3 occult blood stool specimens. Usually mom has a bowel mo

Jhari

Jhari

Fun With Aphasia

Aphasia is a horrible thing, not only for the victim, but for the ones who care for them. I just don't understand how everything gets so mixed up in the brain. Mom says some really off the wall things. On good days, she can say quite a few whole sentences that make sense. Today was an ok day, but I just wanted to share some of the things she says. I got my hair-cut last night and usually she notices something different. She hadn't said anything about it, so I asked her, "Do you see anything di

Jhari

Jhari

Frustrated with doctor

The last time I posted, which has been almost 2 months, mom still had bacteria in her ur ine. but they were not treating it. We had an appt. with a urologist on Jan. 8th. Before we went there, she had an ultrasound of her bladder done . A week later, when we actually visited the dr., she had a ct scan and he also st. cath'd her for a UA C&S. I was there when he did it and the urine was dark and cloudy and the last bit was thick and white. He said that just may be because she doesn't drink en

Jhari

Jhari

Up and down, as usual

Once again, it's been almost 2 months since I've posted anything. Not much has changed, still up and down. Mom had a UTI since July. She had several courses of Macrobid and everytime they rechecked it was still there. So last time (about 3 weeks ago) they tried Gentamycin IV . When they rechecked it showed she had a colonization of another bacteria - Prodius, I think. They are only treating her with cranberry capsules, we'll see.   I guess since I have posted last mom was in the hospital. My s

Jhari

Jhari

Better Days

Yesterday mom's sister and her daughter came to visit. They have not seen each other in over a year. I was a little concerned over how it would go. Mom was taking a nap when I got there and I let her sleep until the company got there. When they did come, I got mom up and we went out to the little dining room. I think mom did ok, but she had trouble getting the right words out (of course) and they are not used to it. Same response as most people - "oh my, she's so confused". But all in all, it wa

Jhari

Jhari

Feeling Drained

It's been months since I've posted anything, funny how time gets away from us. It was a very busy summer, had the grandkids alot of the time, which is a good thing.   In August, mom was pretty sick for a few days. It took the nurses 2 days to get a reply from the dr. She had a uti. I have switched doctors since then, by the way. After each series of the antibiotic, she still had the bacteria. She went through 3 different series of it. I finally requested that she be put on something prophalact

Jhari

Jhari

Up and Down (as usual)

Since my last post, I have gotten alot accomplished. I picked up the money from the lawyer on the 14th and deposited it the next day. After talking with the caseworker, I learned I had 10 days to spend the money down. So I got the cemetery plot mystery figured out and made an appt. with the guy that sells headstones. My husband and I went to look at them last Monday night and picked one out and payed for it. The next day I went shopping and bought mom lots of new clothes, pillows, jewelry, comfo

Jhari

Jhari

Better Days

The week has been a pretty good one. Since school is out now, I have the grandkids more often, which is a good thing. I have been taking them to the home with me when I go and that really seems to cheer mom up. Tuesday was mom's 85th birthday. There is a little room there for people to have privacy for family get togethers. I went over and decorated, party balloon, tablecloth, the works. Amanda and the girls came. We had little sandwiches, chips and dip and deviled eggs. I made a cake, too. Mom

Jhari

Jhari

Life Goes On

Yesterday I signed the papers on Mom's house. I will get the check on Monday. I am planning on buying a double gravestone for mom and dad. Today is the 43rd anniversary of my dad's death. I am allowed to have $8,000.00 in assets for mom. She has a life insurance policy that counts as $4,900.00. So I have to spend down to $3,000.00. I'll probably put more into her burial fund, have 7,100.00 in that now. Plus she needs new clothes, alot of new stuff. The Public Assistance people have been very hel

Jhari

Jhari

Overcome with grief

Thursday was the 2-wk. anniversary of my brother's death. Friday would have been his 62nd birthday. I am finding that even though 5 yrs. seems like a long time, it was not nearly enough time to say good-bye. I feel an ache and a rawness inside that will not go away.   We were at my mom's house tonight, clearing things out. The closing date is on Wednesday. It was sad and when we got home I wanted so much to call my brother. We talked almost every day. I miss him so much. Right now I feel overc

Jhari

Jhari

My week

I have not been to see my brother since I posted a week ago. I had planned on going at least once last week, but I am just too exhausted (in every way) to make the 2 1/2 hr trip up. So I have been keeping in touch with phone calls and texts. He is growing weaker every day, but is still aware when he is awake.   Mom has been doing ok. On Saturday, the nursing home had a Mother's Day Social. I had asked them to lay mom down right after lunch, since the social was at 2, the time she usually nap

Jhari

Jhari

Long, sad,days

The week hasn't too bad I guess. Right now I am so exhausted I can barely think straight. I had talked with my sis ter-in-law on Thursday morning. She said my brother's speech is getting slurred and if I wanted to talk with him I should probably come soon. My nephew had also called Tuesday night and said my brother wanted him to call me and tell me that he wanted to see me. So we had planned on going up Sunday after church. However, after I talked with my SIL that day I decided to go up Friday.

Jhari

Jhari

We will call it a good week (and pray for another)

It's been a week again since I have blogged. Mom and I had a good day to see the doctor last week. The doc said that she saw improvement in mom. No new orders and don't have to go back for another year. We went through the drive-thru at MacD's , I got mom a shake and a hamburger and she ate and drank all of it.   Last week was ok, up and down, as usual. Mom seems to be talking more and understanding more. She has walked twice for me in the last few days. She always says, why? and I try to expl

Jhari

Jhari

Update on my exciting life.....or not

I can't believe it's been 3 weeks since I posted anything. So much has happened and I had intended on posting at least once a week, but you can see how that went. My daughter and I visited my brother in the hospice house, very nice place. His skin was yellow and he looked pretty bad. But we spent a couple of hours, got to see one of my nephews. I took an old picture album and we looked at that and even laughed. That was almost 2 wks. ago. I had stopped calling him, after he moved in there, but I

Jhari

Jhari

My day with my brother

My husband got the day off work today and we went to my brother's house. It's about 115 miles away, takes about an hour and a half. I wasn't quite sure of what to expect. They have his bed in the family room. He looked very gray, dosed in and out, but wanted us in the room and he actually talked quite a bit, even joked some. Sometimes he just talked with his eyes closed. His left side is not functioning at all.. When hospice brought equipment on Tuesday, they forgot the urinal. So Tuesday night

Jhari

Jhari

Sad days

I did not take mom to the neurologist yesterday. She was not in a good mood when I got there and more than that, it was snowing, 25 degree temperature and a bitter wind. It's hard for me when she wants to go and I just did not have the strength to deal with that yesterday, so I cancelled. She has refused PT 3 times now, so that has been cancelled also.   Last night I talked with my brother. He sounded very weak. They brought in a hospital bed, w/c, bedside commode, the works yesterday. He sa

Jhari

Jhari

Neurologist tomorrow"

The weekend wasn't too bad, very busy. We went to an Easter egg hunt at my daughter's house on Saturday. The grandkids came with us that afternoon. I took them with me when I went to see mom. When we first got there the nurse was giving mom her meds. She took a drink of water and (seemingly) swallowed the pills. When we got to her room, I noticed there were pills in her hand. I said, "Mom, you didn't take your pills?" She said, "Shhhhh, don't tell them. I don't want them." I tried to reason with

Jhari

Jhari

Another Day

My daughter and I had planned on going to see mom today and have lunch with her. I made up some little sandwiches of tuna salad and egg salad on pumpernickel cocktail bread and Amanda brought chips. Plus we had yogurt, pudding and reese cups. While I was getting ready to go my brother called. I had not talked with him yesterday. He had seen the oncologist yesterday. He is still having trouble with his left arm and leg. They did start him on a steroid, hoping that may help some. He is not going t

Jhari

Jhari

Update

Mom is doing better, she still had a couple of bouts of diarrhea on Friday, but was up in her chair for quite awhile. Saturday she was much better, in up the chair, dressed in regular clothes and at the dining room table. She also resumed pt. She doesn't like pt, I guess she feels it is worthless. I tried to explain to her that if she is stronger it is easier on me. the therapist said that sometimes when she comes to get mom, mom says, "No teacher!"   After last week, I was a little burnt out

Jhari

Jhari

A Fall Today

I was just thinking the other day, it's been quite awhile since mom has had a fall. She has been doing ok, up and down. I did get her out last week. Took her for a long ride, went through the McD drive-thru. It was a wonderful, sunny day. That did alot to lift her spirits. The 1st time she'd been out since, I think, October.   Some day s I can understand almost everything she is trying to say. Some days I don't have a clue. She keeps patting her face and saying, "it's awful". I don't know if

Jhari

Jhari

1-yr. Anniversary

A year ago tonight, I called mom to check on her. It was Thanksgiving and I had taken her home just 4 hrs. earlier. She picked up the phone and said words I didn't understand. She did get out, "something's wrong". I ran to our van (which wouldn't start), so I started running to her house, which was just a ways up the street. The door was locked, luckily I had the key. When I went in, she started calling me mom. I called the ambulance. Mom kept looking in the mirror and sticking her tongue out. T

Jhari

Jhari