I bought another car. I did not tell my dad and I know he would have told me "not to, Im not ready to drive in the big city, I can't afford the debt", etc but I needed it. My foot was so busted and blistered up from taking the bus. I still use my bus pass but I love having my car if I just need to go down the street to pick up my medicine or get my groceries. My supervisor puts me on the schedule a lot to work until 8pm and they do not want me to wait for the bus late at night because the area
seizures
I know you guys told me I should see the neurologist but I had to reschedule my appointment for next month and wont be able to see him until February. I am kind of afraid to bring it up because I don't want to get my license taken away. I really want to be able to drive again when I feel comfortable and right now I don't have to be reviewed by the med board until 2014 so I don't want these mysterious dizzy spells to mess me up if he puts in his chart that I still have seizures. I looke
I think I've been having seizures in my sleep. It started like maybe a month or couple weeks ago. I cant remember. I was trying to fall asleep and I remember having a dream but it was like I was in and out of consciousness. I just remember feeling like someone was pushing me into my bed and I was pulling my pillow to keep from falling. This happened again but once again I thought maybe it was just a nightmare or something. Thanksgiving morning it happened again but this time I knew it was a seiz
Thank you guys so much for all of your encouraging comments on my last entry. I don't know what I would do without this site. You guys always know exactly what to say. I just wanted to update you guys really quick. The day after my disappointment, I found a doctor here, they wrote me a prescription for the baclofen, and Im waiting for them to schedule OT for me. I get my supra scalpular injection in my shoulder on Monday and I have been taking my old dosage of baclofen so hopefully that will hel
Today I went to get fitted and and get my bioness registered. I was so excited figuring out how to charge it up lastnight and I woke up at 6:00 this morning from the beep that it was fully charged. The green light was so beautiful to me. It was like now is the beginning "the first day of the rest of my life". I never fell back asleep but instead stretched all morning and wore the splint to keep my fingers straight since I couldn't keep it on lastnight. Unfortunately I had to keep removing it and
I am glad I stopped the anti-depressant. I think increasing my dosage made things worse. I felt like a sad zombie. Now I don't know if its the fact I stopped the anti-depressant or the fact great things are happening but I can actually feel happy.
I got a job! I had an interview last Monday and they just called me yesterday to offer me the position. I was afraid I wouldn't get it because I was 20 minutes late to the interview. I had to walk about 45 minutes to get there because I was too imp
It's coming Monday. It has been a very frustrating journey and has not turned out the way i want but I think it will be worth it. Voc Rehab was not going to pay, my dad's insurance denied it twice, I got the certified hand therapist to help with my appeal but even after she vouched for me that e-stim works on my hand, the reauthorization still got denied. I don't have the time or energy to keep fighting the insurance companies. I looked on the internet for used ones for sale, I called the hospit
Today is a day I don't want to remember
so clear in my mind like the 11th of September
2001 such a tragic year
who knew I'd spend the rest of my life in fear
Not only of terrorist attacks but of seizures for life,
of more surgeries, another stroke, never becoming someone's wife
Who can slip a ring on my crippled hand?
I'd rather have been killed by the taliban
because my life ended in 2001
God gave me 12 years to have my fun
Since then happiness has been few and far in between
No matt
Today I took a bath by myself since my stroke in 2001. It was a milestone. I remember when I had a huge bath seat I used to sit on right after the stroke. When I moved in with my dad he luckily had a stand up shower. I began using the handle from wal mart http://www.walmart.com/ip/Safe-Er-Grip-Bathtub-and-Shower-Assist-Bar-16.5/10848474?findingMethod=rr to help me get into the bath tub when I moved into my first apartment.
Now today, living on my own, I got into the bath tub, took a bath, an
Well I had wrote a very long entry the other day, with subheadings, bold, caps, the works, but it disappeared so I will just give a recap and additional updates
First of all, I quit the internship. It was just too much on me. I was tired of feeling like a bad worker. The lawyer didn't like the way I talked and interacted with clients plus he made it clear that I did not work fast enough so I quit. I consulted with a school counselor first and she advised me that the best thing to do would be
Hey everyone I appreciate all of your support during my new journey. I wish I could blog everyday. It is so many new experiences but I am just too busy. Every morning I go to class then I go to my internship every day. Some days I work as many as 7 hours and some days Im in class for 4 hours straight. It is a lot of work. I work at a law firm and I am pretty much the lawyer's slave. I got no training and they pretty much threw me in there head first. I have only been working there 2 weeks but I
I just found out I got approved for special transportation services! I had to do an assessment on Thursday and I got my eligibility letter in the mail today. This means that I will not have to stand outside waiting for the city bus. I will be allowed to take the special transportation bus which transports people with disabilities door to door wherever we need to go. Who needs a car? I am excited. I start my internship on Monday and start my classes on Thursday.
Today I went to the gym in my
Thank you so much everyone. You guys are so great to me and I really appreciate all of the support. I moved into my one bedroom apartment last Friday. I was lucky to have my dad and brother move my stuff while my mom helped me decorate and clean. Without my car I have been stuck here just waiting on school and work to start but I enjoy the relaxation for now. I enjoy being here and having my own space. I can do whatever I want and i feel so independent.
One of the things that made me most pr
Thanks so much everyone! Your support really means a lot to me. My dad has been nothing but negative. He doesn't want his youngest and only daughter to finally be away from home. It is really irritating though. I know he just wants to protect me and he just wants to be there for me but it is making me push him away. In his mind he is just trying to look out for me. but in my mind he is just being selfish, not letting me follow my dreams, and limiting me. I think he will come around though. He li
Well I gave up on getting help from all of these people who are supposed to so called help (Vocational Rehabilitation). I did a vocational assessment and I pretty much have the idea that my counselor is not going to help me at all. After she told me I would need an address before she could transfer my case or a job offer before they could help me move, I went out and tried to make it happen. I got approved for a 1 bedroom apartment, found out they have a special transportation van that takes dis
I really dont understand why everything has to be so difficult. My insurance said my accident was my fault and since I got hit from the left I could not see what happened and couldn't explain to them how I was hit. Im still thankful I didn't get a ticket because hopefully it won't show up on my record while the med review board is reviewing my driving privileges. BUT, now I have no car. After wasting nearly 10 grand between 2 cars and inexperienced driver car insurance premiums, I have no money
I have bad news. Friday on my way home from work, I got in yet another car accident. A pick up truck knocked me off the road and I charged into a road sign and knocked over a light pole. The power lines fell on my car and my airbags bruised up my face a little. It was awful I had to sit in the car for nearly an hour before I could get out. All I could do was cry. My left hand must have jumped when I got hit and the airbags must have collided with my wrist because I had a huge blister on my wrist
Thanks so much everyone. I am so thankful for this website. You guys give me so much valuable information. Its hard not having anyone pushing me, motivating me, and helping me find things to get better since my family has pretty much acepted the fact that this is how I am. but you guys are like my stroke family always giving me great advice
Running off of my motivation from Friday night, I decided to make some phone calls today. First I called Bioness and left a message for the sales rep I
jeez i wrote a whole entry then somehow the page jumped to the message board. Well I felt like blogging while I was in a good mood. but after my whole entry got washed away not in such a good mood anymore but still motivated I am motivated to get my hand back. Maybe its the zoloft but I really feel like I can get better. I will not be like this for long. I have been like this long enough. I am learning about Faith in my Faith & Healing class at church. It is very helpful and so scriptural.
Well I seen the neurologist last week. Instead of getting medicine for pseudobulbar affect, I asked him for an anti-depressant. He gave me zoloft but said it would take about 4 weeks to start making a difference. I feel good for the most part. I have a boyfriend for the first time in almost 2 years and he gives me lots of love and attention so that definitely helps with the depression. I just wish I could get my dad off my back. Ever since he retired and his girlfriend dumped him, he always has
Thank you so much to all 5 of you who commented on my last blog. I often re-read old comments from time to time for inspiration. Even though I do not reply to you all individually, I always read every comment and I appreciate the support from everyone!
One of the reasons I have not blogged is because I feel depressed and I made a promise last year not to blog about sad things all the time like I used to. I keep things to myself or just write in my prayer journal instead. Sometime it helps. S
Thank you everyone for your prayers in my last blog. I successfully drove myself back and forth to work all week including yesterday for my Saturday class. I take the same route everyday so I am starting to feel more comfortable. It feels great not having to be picked up and dropped off like a little kid. A feel a lot more grown up and independent.
I started work on Tuesday and have been working hard ever since. My co-worker put me to work as soon as I got there. I wore my hand splint but it
Wow my first week of graduate school has been crazy. I am only taking 3 classes but 2 are online so I spend a lot of time reading and typing. It does not help that I have gotten lazy! Being out of school for a year and not living in the college atmosphere anymore, makes it hard for me to finish my assignments. I associate being at home with just relaxing and watching tv so I have to do better. I have 3 more assignments due tomorrow and have not started!
I received an assistantship so I will be
I am awake so I decided to blog. I went to the hematologist last week and my white blood cell count was normal. I have also been sick for the last few weeks though so Im still not sure if anything is wrong. I have to go back and see the hematologist next week so he can look at everything else in my blood and make sure everything is okay.
I was reflecting on 2011 and I realized I got everything I wanted (with the exception of my left field vision). I got a car, a license, a job, and I moved my
Before I begin blogging my Christmas shopping adventure, I want to update from my lost blog entry. If Will and Chandra are reading this, my neurologist called the night I had the dizziness after it finally subsided. He wanted me to get blood work done so he could check and see if my white blood cell count had gotten any better since I switched to my new medicine. He called me in to see him and unfortunately on the way I got dizzy again but luckily my dad was driving. I had to tell him that medic
