I recently read quote of the movie Faults in our stars "Grief does not change you it reveals you" in Jean Riva's blog about her review of that movie. I find that quote so appropriate, yes I know suffering can make person bitter or better, but sometimes I wonder about that. I have heard lot about lot of relationships breaking because of difficulties in their life in form of adversity, but I think there was something wrong in relationship before hand & now that problem came up it broke camel's
As all of you know I love to read books & learn. My favorite genre is spiritual & self help books. I feel as human I am here to learn & grow so love to read self help & spiritual books. God knows I can take all self help I can get lol. Today When I woke up to rainy morning after glorious sunny weekend. looking at cloudy sky I was telling hubby it feels like sun is never going to come out & was never even there day before.We both were comparing how it feels same way when you
I hate computers when they stop working the way they suppose to, but also when I am able to diagnose & fix the problem, it makes me feel so happy. ofcourse I needed help of another nerd to get me out of my computer not connecting to internet problem, but ofcourse I found the solution to fix the problem made me feel so good. I don't know how we lived before without google, internet, mobile & list goes on. time is just flying by I can't believe this will be our last summer before kido fli
For longest time I wondered why did I survive this stroke & what's my purpose here on earth. Yes I had young family so maybe I survived for them. But my husband is fiercely independent, So always thought survived for our young son since he needed his mom in many ways. hubby is good parent, but from time to time being together we make best parental unit. lately I have seen in so many instances I will be coming up with great ideas in regards to our son's future which are on the spot. Weird thi
today heard this title line. Ït takes courage to believe best is yet to come"". Specially believing this when you are going through tough time. but looking back in my life I have become believer in that line. I wasted countless months and hours crying about how my stroke ruined my life & I have nothing to live for. had it not been my hubby's strength & our son I would have given up long time back. I am so thankful for them both.I didn't have any courage to believe something good will com
I don't know what I want to do when I grow up. I have never made any future plans for my life. always have done at the time. you can say I have always flown with flow without doing big planning. I don't even know what I am passionate about. when I was student I was busy in studies, when working was busy in work now I am mom & wife so busy in my mom & wife duties. Some days are better in fulfillment department when he is not fighting with me & doing right things, some days are frust
hubby & I were just talking about how we both ended up together. There were lot of forks in our life's journey, had we took different road we would have been never ended together, and have our amazing son & this life together. So I was telling him you get this idea or inspiration in your head & you actively work on it which leads to that particular road when you are at crossroad. lot of time we were not even aware at that crossroad but think that''s what you want from your life. So
recently I talked with friend of mine we used to always see each other at our kids recreational basketball games. Now as kids have all grown up & teenagers. I see all of us parents are suddenly getting wisdom to back off & let kids make their own mistakes & learn from it. Before I used to feel oh I m so hands off parent compared to some others parents & I used to equate myself as not as good parent as they were. I guess my son started rebelling before theirs did lol. But I do se
we will celebrating my 10th stroke anniversary & valentine day on Feb 8th. It has been long road, but I so want to tell that distraught Asha at the beginning of my post stroke journey that please don't be so hard on yourself things will get better. I am so thankful for having amazing hubby & young son & my whole family who rallied around me & helped me pick up pieces of my life. I am so thankful for my own impatient nature which helped me fuel do more things for myself & our
hubby & I have not lived apart since stroke, it has been over 9 years of joined by hip, so when this recent snowstorm made him stay near his office we were both worried how I would handle it, but ofcourse I am blessed in our child's department suddenly he was most agreeable teen & would listen to all my instructions, and was amazingly kind in looking after me. hen I asked if he can stay with me till I fall asleep, he was kind enough to do that so that I don't feel lonely. We got more tha
in my last blog I bragged about success of our son in his academics & in comments Fred mentioned how about gifting him new car or something similar, which of-course made me uncomfortable since my views on it varies. I feel as a student its his job to do well in studies & you don't get any rewards for that. his rewards will come when he is able to support himself & his family & can buy himself all toys he will want in his life. As a parent our job is to provide him food, shelter
As we rolled into new year want to wish every one happy, healthy & prosperous New Year. I never made resolutions in life, but recently when I read Jean riva's blog I loved her idea of just one mantra resolution like find contentment & courage. I was wondering what could be my one mantra resolution for this year. I think I need to learn to accept myself the way I am & stop putting myself down for some things which went wrong cause of me. for this year I think my resolution will be "
Whenever I talk with my old college friend here in US it always ends up with discussion on destiny & choice topic. Both of us are firm believer in our views. She is firm believer in destiny & me in choices, I strongly feel choices we make in our life creates your destiny & she like lot of Indian people and believes who believes in destiny & astrology. She thinks if it is bad phase in your life you will make wrong choices in life. I am firm believer in doing right things & g
In life we all get brick walls in our path. I loved Randy Pausch( author of last lecture & professor at Carnegie melon)'s take on it. Brick wall is there to stop other people not to you. It is there to make you realize how badly you want something. If you want something bad enough you will preserve & find way around it. I know every time in my life post stroke when I face brick wall & get frustrated I remember those wise words & keep on fighting to my way around it based on how
I get lot of AHA moment after watching Oprah's super soul sunday & my discussion with my spiritual partner my hubby. recently author Mark Nepo author of book of awakening was on super soul sunday & something he said hit home for me. he said and I paraphrase it when you feel you are so broken and as a human who has not felt loss in their life when you feel you are so broken & can't come out of the muck you are in, but at that time realizing not everything is broken gives you strength
between two of us hubby is better parent, he has better control on kido where as I do daily management of providing food & making sure he is doing his job right. So I am mostly nagger making sure he has done his homework & prepared for his upcoming tests. My mom thinks that parents play very pivotal role in children's lives, so I guess if your kids are doing well than as as a parent you have done good job of raising them, & if not than you failed as a parent. versus hubby think ver
not much is going on in chandra's household except school, exams & birthday celebration. no big AHA moments either just routine. though I am grateful for my routine life, we all are healthy, happy & enjoying amazing fall colors. kido is very busy with his SATs & school load, since he is driving usually he takes me to his classes & activities. today hubby & I rook part in walkathon for American heart & stroke association. It was fun walk. nobody was running it was peace
since this is my blog I am going to write about myself. I have been on this post stroke journey close to 9+ years now and I can still look back & see how far I have come in my post stroke journey. I know how bad & frustrated I felt right after my stroke when I would mess up simple things I could do before. I felt like huge failure when I would misplaced simple things around the house. I spent lot of time in the beginning looking for phone, keys or anything which was in my hand. It used t
School started for us and since its his junior year kido is busiest than ever before. Though lot of things are added in his plate. Now I am meeting lot of his friends who are girls, this chapter is new for me, but ofcourse its sweet too. girls used to be pain before not anymore. I used to know all his friends parents before since we used to meet at recreation games. now have to find way to meet all this girls parents too. Recently hubby & I stained our deck, we did it after 10 years, and I
We are blessed to have wonderful bright child but ofcourse he is teenager & does not use his brain in all decision-making. he will make silly decisions based on what he talked with other teenagers without thinking it through consequences. I don't know what would I have done if hubby wasn't there with me in keeping him on right path. I keep on trying to get him understand we are in his team & want best for him & there is no ulterior motives for us to make him take right decisions. Of
As I am growing older in age & in my wisdom, I guess got lot of time in my hand & think of lot of things. like every one I also look at my past & think of things that have hurt me which was said by my parents or siblings, which have made the person I am today. I got lot of regrets about something I did not do right while growing up & I blame my mom for not handling it correctly. I was just venting it to my husband about it & telling him about something beautiful I read in the
another AHA moment as I am getting older & getting comfortable in my all role playings of life. I know this for sure I am getting more mature in my motherhood & wifehood roles. I know just after stroke it used to make me very angry when doing my duties instead of saying thank yous I would get criticize for things which either went good or bad. Problem was if things went good then criticism won't bother me since I could just blow away it as kids oh what do they know, but would take it ver
I am such a blessed person, surrounded by so much love & laughter that post stroke life also feels great. My mom used to tell me when I was young that even though I was accidental child I always got best in life, which includes great education & resources to do well. Even though got hand me down clothes & books I did well since I was surrounded by lot of love by family. I am most fortunate in my hubby & his side of family. My life partner was picked by my family. at that age my
I saw oprah's commencement speech of 2013 to harvard & loved it. I totally agree with her words of wisdom about what one considers failure in life, änd I quote her "There is no such thing as failure. Failure is just life trying to move us in another direction. Now, when you’re down there in the hole, it looks like failure. … Give yourself time to mourn what you think you may have lost, but then here’s the key: Learn from every mistake because every experience, encounter and particularly your
I am reading this great book four agreement by some spiritual author, its great read. It talks about how following these simple 4 rules you can create heaven right here on earth & end almost all suffering. his first rule is be impeccable with your words. what you think & tell yourself creates lot of suffering. I know this for fact. his second rule is don't take anything personally. people will say things without meaning it & if you take it personally you make it your reality, and a
